During the coming weeks, Ruth tried to figure out how to help her friend who had gone to the extreme in her religion. She prayed for her friend and decided to check on her often by calling and visiting. She also decided that she would not remain silent when she heard her friend say something that is not in accordance with Bible teaching. She tried to encourage her friend to go to church, make friends there, and also consult the pastor on the grief she was going through. From the response she got, it was clear to Ruth that helping her friend would not be an easy undertaking. She nevertheless committed herself to trying.
At the same time, God was working on Ruth’s life. One of her prayer points to God every morning was for God to find her a soulmate. She realized that one day her children would grow up and leave her. Most likely they would leave when it was time for them to go to university since they were likely to go to their dad. When she counted how many years were left for that to happen, she was concerned that very soon she would be on her own. She told herself that if she did not find someone to be her companion soon enough, when the time came that she really did need someone, there may be none.
One day, Ruth received an email from a guy who she had met through her work and who she knew lived abroad. It turned out that he had moved back home. She knew very little of him but when they got talking, she came to learn that he was a God fearing man who was well to do. She was however not attracted to him and besides, he was younger than her. These two issues left her confused about whether he was the man God chose for her.
Not being attracted to the guy was a concern for Ruth. However, it was a good thing because it meant that Ruth could take her time getting to know the guy instead of rushing into a relationship that she was not ready for. She dreaded ending up with the wrong guy a second time. The first time, she had fallen head over heels in love and look how that turned out. The fact that the guy was younger than her by 2 years bothered Ruth because she needed someone who could take care of her and she did not think she could depend on a man who was younger than her.
Ultimately, because she did not want to turn away a person who might be worth her time, she agreed to at least befriend him making it clear that she was not interested in a relationship as yet. The guy, whose name was Donald, responded by saying that God would open doors if it is His will.
Ruth surrendered the friendship she was building with Donald to God. She explained her feelings to God, telling Him that she expected that the man He chose for her would be someone attractive and older than her. She again surrendered the feelings of misgiving that she had about Donald to God and asked Him to give her confidence and security.
Ruth knew that she wanted to take her sweet time getting to know him. She hoped that Donald was patient enough and she told herself that if he was God’s choice for her, he would stick around until she was ready. She worried about having to introduce Donald to her children eventually. She told herself that it was not necessary to make such an introduction until much later on when she herself was ready for a relationship.
Ruth was very rigid on the matter of intimacy. She was in no rush for it and it would only happen if she got married. Sex outside marriage is something Ruth was strongly against. She believed that sex should only feature in marriage.
To further complicate Ruth’s decision on Donald, there was another man who Ruth was attracted to and who was God fearing, well to do and older than her. He however did not show any interest in Ruth. She would have much preferred the guy she was attracted to being the one showering her with the attention she was getting from Donald. She questioned God on why he would choose Donald over that other guy. God told her that He sees the hearts of men. Something Ruth herself or anyone else, could not do.